My Laundry Drier Frightens Me

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Dear Ron,
I am afraid of my laundry drier. It makes the most godawful noises that make me think the world is coming to an end. I have spoken to a repairman about it, but he says the machines are supposed to sound like that. What should I do about it? And please don’t tell me to wear wet clothes.
Wet Worrier

Dear Wet Worrier,

I would not advise you to wear wet clothes. Do you think I am crazy? If I told you to do that, you might sue me for getting the sniffles.
Why don’t you try a clothes line?  For the youth in the crowd, I will explain:  When I was a boy, my mother used to hang up the wet clothes on a line in the backyard. All the neighbours did too, and then everyone would stand outside admiring each other’s wet clothes.
They would also enjoy watching the droplets of water fall from the clothes.  It was such fun! Conversations would start up, friendships would begin, and we had a community spirit. Nowadays, of course, it is different. Machines do everything, and we have more time to feel scared.  Start a trend! Bring back the clothesline. All you need is strong ropes, a pulley and some clothespins. And invite me over for a watch. Avanti!

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