A Craps Shooter In A Windstorm

Dear Ron,

I am a man in my late middle years and I fear that I am losing my short-term memory. I forget what I did or did not do only moments after I do it (or don’t do it). For example, I am in the shower, soaping  somewhere  and I don’t remember whether I took my shampoo or not. I take out a shirt to wear, set it down and I continue to look for the same shirt in my wardrobe. I search for a key that is in my hand. Is my cerebellum out of whack, and am I too far down the slippery slope to reverse it?

Forget About It

Dear Forget,

Remember (if you can) that we all experience memory loss as we age. It is normal and merciful. A wise Ethiopian chieftain once told me that to remember is okay, but to forget is better. Especially if you have a wife that looks like a hyena.There are tricks to remember what you just did. When I take a shampoo I always let a little lather gather in my ear so that when I am soaping my other regions I can always go back to my ear to confirm whether I have already lathered. It was the same chieftain, by the way, who showed me that trick, and he had hair that glistened.

The shirt problem I can’t help you with simply because I own only one shirt at a time and I remember to wash it. About the key? Well, try to keep your hand at eye level at all times so that you see that it is not languishing in your pocket but is right where you will need it. You might want to write things down and carry these reminders with you. Have it in the same pocket. Or better yet, hold on to it. If people want to shake your hand, you can always just pretend that you are not friendly and give them a nod instead.  Don’t let them sidetrack you.

What other nuggets can I pass on? Fish is good for the memory and garlic too. I think.  But don’t quote me on that one. My memory is becoming as dicey as a craps shooter in a wind storm. Good luck.

I hope this helped.

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