I am a guilt-ridden human specimen. I am ashamed to say that I was at a restaurant today and I neglected to leave a tip. The reason I didn’t do it was because I suspect I am too “frugal,” and because I thought I could get away with it without appearing to the whole restaurant to be a miser. I did this by bypassing the tip option on my credit card on purpose. Now I feel awful and am almost ready to go back and make a confession . What should I do?
Dear So Sorry,
I could scold you for being such a cheapie, but I won’t. I suspect that would just feed into your self-loathing and could lead to an embarrassing outcome for you. The fact is most restaurants don’t pay their service employees much over the subsistence level in Bangladesh, and these unfortunates have to run, spin and kowtow to the likes of customers like you in order to make ends meet.
It goes without saying that you did not do the right thing when you omitted hitting the tip option on your way out of the eatery. I would be very ashamed of myself too had I ever done anything like that. I always make it a point to tip a waiter. I usually don’t give much because I don’t want him to be upset at the next customer who might not be able to leave a tip comparable to my own, therein casting myself as superior to this other person. It is just not in my nature to show off in this manner.
Still, I do give something. I can understand that you want to go back and make a confession, but I do not think it would help the situation. In fact, it might even cause a hubbub.You made a mistake, you admitted the mistake, and now it is up to you to not repeat it the next time. If you are really in a bad way financially, go to a fast food joint where tipping is not required. I always find it pleasant to pay before eating my meal anyway, and not have to worry about appearing miserly about not tipping enough.
I hope this helped.